Just listened to you on Distorted View! LOVED IT! I was very intrigued, a little disgusted and NOT turned on!

You are a very ugly whore.

My Lapsy- A Personal Story

Listen up kiddies, this is a REAL story, and it might concern you!
I went to a clothing store to buy clothes, and while in the dressing room I was talking to myself about how to put in my lapse in the right way so that the clothes would fit.
After I had purchased my clothes, I was met by two cops who asked me for my identification and thereupon, started to ask a long series of questions about my life, such as past drug use, place of work, family, criminal history, and other miscellaneous personal information.
That’s right! Someone called the cops on me because I was talking about my lapse in the dressing room!
I wasn’t arrested, but I was frisked and was treated like compost!
In response to this, I wrote a little creed that everyone should commit to memory before entering department stores:

Oh, Temple of Materialism,
I pledge to never perform sacrilege to the clothes in the department stores by mentioning my lapse.
I shall remain hushed at all times in the sacred halls, as is appropriate at Temple, and never bemoan my failing, bloating body parts.
I must realize that offending someone’s sensibilities is of the utmost sin. I must also realize that an asshole with a cell phone can create his own Gestapo.
I must realize that only old women may talk about their lapse.
Subjects of speech shall henceforth be restricted to these two areas of societal approval:
1.) When young, I will speak about who I wish to fuck, and also relate to my friends the many experiences of my whorehole being fucked.
2.) When I am old, I will only speak of the weather.
I shall never say anything about the kiddies on slave wages in Indonesia who make my clothes.
Freedom is only “not free” if you do not do what is accepted.
If my lapse is a form of protest against assholes, then only assholes would find the protest illegal.
Henceforth, oh Temple of Materialism, I shall only bow, genuflect and kneel in the Temple of Materialism.
In contrite guiltiness,
Americunt, oh land of liberty for whores.

the dirtiest thing cheryl? more like the sexiest thing…like ever!!!!! i wish i was there when it happened so that i could have taken pictures. i would have made placemats out of the pictures.

Absolutely LOVED it, Honaye! The freaks on DV are lovin’ you too!

Podshow -, I love it Cheryl!!! You should make a single of that! Love it! Hon-aye!